As a young boy, I loved the wonder of exploration and discovery. My imagination was stirred by avid reading of wilderness adventurers like Daniel Boone and Davy Crockett, inspiring me to scout the woods near our home. A real treat for me was to occasionally visit an older cousin that lived in a farming area, replete with enormous woods, that dwarfed my little “suburban forest.” We would navigate through the trees, cross the creek, spend hours on our journey – sharing the joy of discovery. One would call out to the other: “Come check this out”, “Look what I found!” This depicts for me a workable marriage template. Two treasure hunters will never be bored while there’s new treasure to chase, find, and unpack.
What excites me most about my wife is the treasure she carries in her earthen vessel (2 Corinthians 4:7). Her passionate “God chasing” ensures new delights for me, as we share a common spiritual table. Her unique human expression is unmatched because there is none exactly like her, and there is none like Him, the source of all that shines from within her. I too, endeavor to keep a freshness about my journey in God. Insights and revelations that I glean from the Spirit, nourish our one-flesh union. When I partake, she partakes.
Yet there are times I feel detached and world-weary, treasure-less and even disinterested. First place to look is in the mirror. Am I bored with myself? This will often manifest in anger or discontent that gets conveniently projected onto the person I live with. Accusation, blame, unrealistic expectations, seem a convenient way to lighten my load. No treasure here.
Next, I look at my level of enjoyment and encounter with God. When prospering, I am inclined to include others in my circle of blessing; when lacking, into my web of misery, managing to redirect the real cause as being something other than what it really is. If only we had more money; if only I had a better job; if only God would answer my prayers; if only I was appreciated more. No treasure here.
To rediscover the treasure in one’s marriage, one must rediscover the Treasure Himself.